Dealing with mean girls

Hi,
It is a simple fact- at some point everyone is going to have someone be mean to them, no matter who they are and sometimes for no apparent reason. Today I am going to share a few researched tips on ways to deal with people who are being horrible to you, or you are in an argument with.

Everyone, at some point, will experience being the 'mean girl' and being the victim. Being the victim is no fun, and we have all been there. It is hard, and horrible and sometimes it feels like there is nothing you can do. Try these few things next time you are the victim, and see if it makes a difference.

1. Don't assume someone is horrible
It is important to remember that just because someone is being nasty one day doesn't mean they are a horrible person- you have no idea what is going on in their life. This is no excuse for being mean, but you still need to understand that there is almost always a reason behind this- it may just have nothing to do with you. Remembering this when you are being targeted is hard, but will almost certainly help you understand why this is happening. For more information, make sure you look at some websites, such as this one, about reasons behind bullying and nastiness.

2.Tell and adult.
You don't have dob the person in, but make sure that an adult knows that something is going on. They can then support you, and it will be much easier to explain when something that needs their attention happens. A lot of people think they can deal with it on their own, but having someone else (preferably an adult) know what is going on can be invaluable.

3. Don't spread it.
One of the worse things you can do, and one of the ways to most upset the 'mean' girl, is telling everyone about the issue- and getting more people involved. It is best to just leave the issue, and only tell one close friend if you absolutely have to.

4.Don't be mean back.
Don't give them anything they can use against you. If they say something, don't retaliate, and don't send messages when you are angry. And perhaps most importantly, don't give them back what they are giving to you.

5.Try and avoid talking/messaging on social media
Texting or sending messages is not the best way to deal with any situation. Try and avoid confronting or talking to someone who is being mean to you any way that isn't face to face, especially because messages can be taken the wrong way or used against you.

6.Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a form of emotional/mental abuse that involves manipulation of events, conversations and actions to make the victim believe they did something that they didn't do, or that they are actually the one in the wrong. Make sure you are aware of how to recognise gaslighting, and how to respond to it. It is really important to stop yourself from believing this stuff, because it can be really damaging and affect you dramatically.

Hopefully you'll remember these tips when you are next in one of these situations. If you need some more information this and this website may be useful.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

2 Comments

Books I've been reading.

 Hi,
I feel like it has been a long time since I wrote a post about what I've been reading, so today I am going to give you an update.

How to keep rolling after a fall by Karole Cozzo
Everyone deserves a second chance. After copping the blame for a cyberbulling incident Nikki Baylor's life is in shreds. She turns to a wheelchair rugby player, and learns how to get her life back on track.

Elsewhere by Gabrielle Zevin

Liz Hall has died, and she quickly finds herself in elsewhere. Elsewhere is very similar to Earth, however you age backwards- from your day of death back to being a baby, when you are re-born. Liz has to learn to let go of her old life, and be happy with her new one.

Quiet:growing up as an introvert in a world the can't stop talking. by Susan Cain

See this post.

A week of Mondays By Jessica Brody

Ellison Sparks wished for another go, a do-over. And she got what she wanted...a week full of Mondays.

Falling into Place By Amy Zhang

Liz Emerson decided that the world would be better off without her. She ran her Mercedes of the road, but still doesn't understand what repercussions her actions will have.

Enter title here By Rahul Kanakia

Reshma is the perfect student and well on the way to being valedictorian. She believes the only way she can beat all the other perfect students is by writing a book. To do this she has to do 'normal' high-school activities.

The lies about truth By Courtney C. Stevens

Sadie Kingston has survived the car accident that killed her friend Trent and left her heavily scarred. But as she reconnects with other people involved in the accident, she struggles to work out what the truth is.

Let me know in the comments below if you would like me to review any of these books.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

0 Comments

6 easy steps to starting your own bullet journal!

Hello!

It's almost Christmas time! That means lots of Christmas carols, it's getting hotter (or colder) and lots and lots of gift giving! It can be hard to keep track of all the things you have to do around Christmas time, and it can also be a great time to start bullet journaling! Don't put it off until next year, grab yourself a notebook and get ready for December. Below I will share my easy steps to creating your own bullet journal.

1.Get yourself a notebook and a pen!

Simple as that, it doesn't have to be anything fancy. Just grab the empty notebook sitting in your top draw or a simple one from the local office supplies store. You can, of course, go fancy and get a proper bullet journal, like I have, but it is not necessary and I would probably recommend trying the system using some normal (and less expensive) notebooks first.

As for pens, they can be anything, I use a uni pin fine line 0.2, but anything will work- just make sure it doesn't go through the paper.

2.Create an index

Or a contents page. Some books already have the built in, but if not simply title the page index and use it to record the pages that things are located in (you may want to leave 2 pages for your index). This makes it heaps easier to find the things that you need.

3.Create a yearly spread.

You can do this any way you want, you could have a list of the things you need to do or events scheduled for each month under sub-headings or you could go full out and create a mini-calendar. This gives you the ability to plan ahead, especially useful for things like school holidays or birthdays. Make sure you add it to your index!

4. Create your monthly spread.

Googling 'bullet journal monthly spreads' will bring up heaps of images of different ideas. Personally I like the idea of a calendar to record events for that month, but find what works for you. This is a more detailed view of your yearly spread for each month. Don't forget to add it into your index.

5. Create your weekly spread

These weekly spreads are the bits of my bullet journal I use the most, and therefore spent the most time perfecting. Generally I will have a small rectangle dedicated to each day, where I can record events and tasks for that day, a study/homework tracker and notes/coming up area. Once again, make sure you find what works for you. Look on pinterest of google for inspiration.

6.Add anything else you want!

The best thing about bullet journals is how easy they are to customise. Simply open to a new page, record it in your index, and fill it with whatever you need. In this post I shared a list of page ideas for your bullet journal. Also make sure you look on pinterest and bullet journaling sites to find more great ideas.

Hopefully these easy steps to starting your own bullet journal have helped you start your own bullet journal. Let me know in the comments below your thoughts on this post, and any easy steps you have for new bullet journalers.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

0 Comments

Relaxation

Hi,

I've been going through a lot of stress and pressure lately, especially with the end of assessment time at school and all the things that have been going on. I know that it is really important to relax and take some time out, especially when things are super busy and today I am going to share some ways to relax.

Why should you relax?

Stress is often seen as such an ugly word, and a horrible thing. Whilst this is not always the case it is important to take some time out, give your mind a break and relax. Relaxation does (according to this site) have some important health benefits including reduce your risk of some disease, improving your mood, reducing risk of depression and assist with decision making. It is actually a necessary part of your lifestyle. Believe it or not!

How do I relax?

Relaxing doesn't always mean sitting on the beach looking out to the horizon and day-dreaming. Although I wish it were true that is very rarely the case for many people. There are heaps of different ways to relax, google ways to relax and thousands of ways appear, today I am going to share a few of them with you. (I used this website)

Journal
Journalling (or maybe bullet journalling?) gives your creative side a chance to have a go, and that is really important. It gives you a chance to unwind and let all of your problems go. Try grabbing a notebook and a pen and give journalling a go, I'd love to hear if it works.

List the good things
Make a list of some of the things you are grateful for, or that you did that you are proud of. I've never tried it but apparently this is a great way to let go and be happy.

Be in nature.
Going outside and sitting in the garden, or (if you are lucky enough) onto the beach can be a great way to re-evaluate the situation and remember what is important.

Do some colouring in.
This is one of my favourite ways to relax, and there are so many 'adult' colouring books out there you have so much to choose from. Spending anywhere between 10 minutes and hours colouring really helps me to de-stress and relax. Particularly if I am having trouble sleeping.

Do something you love
If you get nothing else out of this list, I hope you take away that finding and doing something you love is the best way to relax, there is no magic solution- you have to find what works for you.

Hopefully you can get something out of this post and feel better by giving yourself time to relax. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.
Have a great weekend.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

1 Comments

Let's Stop Complaining

Hello,

Yesterday I saw this quote on pinterest (it is from here)

It got me thinking. Why are people always complaining? Why do we always forget all the good things when one thing goes wrong? Don't worry, I'm guilty of it too. I undestand that a lot of people, myself included, try to be positive and make the best of most situations, but we still end up complaining an awful lot. I think that we all need to learn that it's not the end of the world, everything happens for a reason and we need to be grateful for what we have, not worried about what we don't have or think we want, or the things that we might need to do.

When you walk through the school corridors all I seem to hear is 'ugh, I've got (insert subject here) next' or 'ugh, why do we have to be here' or 'that test was so hard- they didn't teach us anything' Thin k about it for a second. Not one of those things is positive. No one seems to care that they are gifted to be at such a good school, and be able to learn things, and choose the subjects they want to learn. It's all about the bad things. And yes, I understand that people are positive sometimes, but the vast majority of the time everyone is complaining about one thing or another.

All these thoughts on Sunday, let me to pay close attention to the things I heard today, and I noticed (probably more than I usually would) the amount of time everyone wastes complaining about things. Nothing is going to get better if you just spend all your time wishing it was different and complaining about it. I then decided to do some research, and I found that it is common, across all ages, for people to complain ALL THE TIME. I also found that complaining is important, you need to get negative thoughts out. I just do not believe that you should complain all the time about everything, as seems to be the case.

People complain for all sorts of reasons, sometimes they think it will get things fixed (and sometimes it will), sometimes they just want everyone to know what is wrong, and sometimes they think that focusing on the problem will make it solve itself (new flash: it won't). And sometimes letting someone know when something is wrong is important. But it is also important to realise that complaining about everything makes it impossible for you to see the ways you are blessed, and to be positive. It has been scientifically proven that positive thoughts are really good for your mental health, and complaining squashes these positive thoughts.

Which leads me to my challenge, finally, I would love it if we could all try and just for 24hrs not complain once- not a single time. Give it a go and see how much better you feel. After this 24hrs you may be more aware of your nasty complaining habit and you can then focus on complaining less. I know that it is one of my goals for this week.

I really encourage you to give it a go, instead of thinking 'oh, I don't like (insert meal here)' think 'at least I have a hot meal to eat'.

Let me know in the comments why you think we're are so addicted to complaining. What is it that makes it impossible for us to be thankful, and why do we, unknowingly and unwillingly, constantly complain about things- wishing they were different and/or better?

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

0 Comments

Productivity Tips

Hi,
This week is, for me, one of the busiest times of the year. All my assessment for school is on and if I am honest I find it pretty difficult to manage my time effectively. Today I wanted to share 10 productivity tips that I have discovered (and I did do some research) in the hope that it will help you to be more productive.

1.Be neat and tidy
Have an area to work that is not cluttered will save you time- you don't have to clear space before you start and you can focus all your attention on what you are doing.

2.Find some peace and quiet.
Get away from the noise and conversations and be alone in a quiet area. I like to listen to music to help me stay interested.

3.Use a planner (or a bullet journal)
Know when you are busy, and plan accordingly.

4.Create to-do lists
Have a clear idea of what you need to do, and which things are the most important.

5.Work out how much time to spend on each task, and stick to it.
Create a timetable, or allocate half-an-hour to an hour for each task- but make sure your timing is realistic and you stick to it.

6. Remove distractions
If you can't resist, or get distracted easily remove this distractions. Turn your phone off, and put it across the room, log out of social media and stay focused.

7.Don't multitask
While it might seem like a good idea, doing one thing at a time will help you stay focused and do a better job.

8.Set yourself goals.
Set yourself realistic goals for when things need to be completed, and stick to them.

9.Get up early
Start your day early and tackle the big tasks before you get distracted by other things.

10.Reward yourself
Just finished a big task, reward yourself with a treat (or a break) or some time reading or on social media.

Hopefully these tips will help you get the most out of your time. Let me know what things you do to make yourself get more done- I'd really appreciate some tips.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

1 Comments

PRESSURE...

Good Afternoon,
It's here, the dreaded exam week. For me this week is the busiest on my assessment calendar, with a test, or two, each day. A few things come with exam/assessment week- one of them being the huge amounts of stress and pressure. A narrative in an hour, really?

Pressure has some significant consequences on your health, and can make everything seem 10x harder than it actually is. We are constantly surrounded by pressure to succeed and be better than we were last time. But once again, no one is magically going to make the pressure go away. It's not going to magically disappear- you just have to learn to deal with it. Constant pressure leads to stress. Stress can impact your health by causing nausea, over/under-eating, changes to sleeping patterns, and some mental conditions. It is really important, especially with the way things are going, to learn to deal with pressure and stress in the best way possible. Having some strategies to ensure that you minimise the pressure on yourself to succeed will in turn make you stress less. And that is what I would love.

Pressure can come in two forms: from others and from yourself. For me, the biggest source of pressure is myself. I am constantly pushing myself to do better and be the best I can be- and sometimes that is just not possible, sometimes all I want is a break. The pressure I put on myself can sometimes be a really good thing, but other times it makes me stressed and anxious over nothing. I have tried to lessen my internal pressure (is that what it is called?) but I never seem to be able to let go of the high standards I hold for myself, especially when it comes to school.

Outward pressure can also be a good or bad thing. It can encourage you to do your best, but it can also force you to live up to unrealistic or impossible expectations. Being constantly told that you can do better is very damaging to your self esteem, sometimes you just need to be happy with what you are doing and not worry about the pressure family, teachers or friends are putting on you.

The pressure to be perfect all the time, or even at all, is generally very outward motivated. Your friends, family and teachers expect something of you and that is why you are constantly feeling the pressure to meet those expectations. People do not seem to understand that sometimes you just cannot meet those expectations, sometimes you fall down and make mistakes- and even though it happens to everyone no one seems willing to give you a break. I know how it feels to be told to do better, or be as good as you were before all the time, it is exhausting.

All I want is for someone to understand that keeping up high standards is exhausting and it is ridiculous to expect someone to turn up everyday and be at their best all the time. It is not humanly possible to meet every one's expectations, and people need to understand that. Just because you think that I should be able to do something does not mean that I necessarily can.

Pressure is sometimes known as an 'evil' word and I want you to remember that it is not, pressure can push people to do amazing things. But I also want you to remember that putting too much pressure, or having unrealistic expectations for someone is not fair and needs to stop.

Have you ever had unrealistic expectations put on you? How do you deal with stress and pressure?

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

0 Comments

Having an Creative Outlet

Hello,
Did you enjoy my bullet journal post? I loved writing it! Writing blog posts gives me a chance to have a break from school, and all the other things I have to do, it lets me be myself and have a chance to share my ideas. Today I wanted to share some thoughts about having a creative outlet, such as this one, and what it does for me...enjoy!

Before you go 'oh, I'm not creative', consider this: creativity doesn't have to be painting drawing (which is lucky for me, I cannot do either), it, by definition, is use of imagination or original ideas to create something. Creativity simply means using your imagination to create something. And that something can be anything...from a photo, to a story, or even a blog. Don't tell yourself creative outlets are never going to work for you because you aren't creative. Everyone has an imagination- it's the thing that keeps you up at night worrying about what's going to happen tomorrow, and the thing stopping you from climbing a tree- because you are imagining falling. Don't let your imagination be wasted- use it for good!

Our world has become so obsessed with doing everything 'right' that we are losing our creativity. At school, I am constantly told exactly how to do something- and that there is no alternative. We almost never do something just to 'get it out', everything is about meeting deadlines, being good and getting it done well, quickly. Having some way to keep a hold of your creativity is really important, and it can make a whole lot of difference in later life. Expressing yourself and taking some time to do what you want is vital to staying mentally-healthy.

For me, having a creative outlet is really important, everything is always so serious and fact-based that I need some time to just do whatever I want and not let it be right or wrong. A creative outlet allows me to be free to express myself, without worrying about how it will affect me later. Even art classes at school cannot really be counted as a creative outlet because there is a lot of pressure to do something, and that can take the fun away from it.

One of the ways I use my creativity is through blogging. Whilst blogging is not necessarily entirely creative- it does give me the freedom to say whatever I want, without having to worry about what other people will think. It lets me get my opinions heard, when they may not be heard otherwise...

I find that blogging, and the other creative things I do, helps me de-stress and re-focus. When I have a huge day with lots of studying and/or homework, taking a small break to blog, take a few photos or just write helps me concentrate and be much more focused on what I need to do. Having a break to do something I love, and use some of the other parts of my brain really is one of the most effective ways for me to get a lot done.

Hopefully, from reading that, you understand why I believe a creative outlet is important. I assume, that you are now considering taking up some form of creative outlet yourself (if you don't already have one). Remember, when you are choosing \what you want to use to express yourself make sure it is

• Fun and enjoyable- having something that just stresses you out is not going to achieve anything.
• Not too time-consuming- make sure that you can fit whatever you choose into your schedule i.e. don't take up blogging if you will never be able to find the time to post.
• Not based on what other people think- it's their loss if they don't like something you do, and choosing something just because that's what everyone else is doing is not a great way to find a way to express yourself. Different things work for different people.
• Not full of pressure- doing something creative with pressure to do well, or succeed is sometimes great. But never forget that it is important to have some no-pressure time to just express yourself too.

I'd love to know what you do to express yourself, maybe I can find a new creative outlet, let me your thoughts in the comments below. Don't forget to take some me time once in a while.

Read More

Unknown

Share Tweet Pin It +1

0 Comments